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By Courtney Key

Hello Gothamites, long time no see! I’m really sorry for my unexpected and extended leave of recapping absence, and especially for missing “Penguin’s Umbrella” because, well, OSWALD. As you may know if you follow my Twitter, I have been dealing with some family medical problems. I have still been watching and squeeing over Robin Lord Taylor’s fabulous performances, never fear!

I wish I could have picked a better episode to return with, though. I seriously considered only recapping the Oswald scenes for this one because my God it was a snoozer. But I shall soldier on.

We open at Barbara’s penthouse, where Jim has brought Selina to meet with a sketch artist, but Barbara is shockingly NOT THERE. She’s left a “Dear Jim” letter for him, saying she needed to get away to get herself together. I hope wherever it is has an exact replica of this apartment for her to stay in. I worry about Barbara outside of her natural apartment habitat. Selina takes Jim’s distraction as an opportunity to grab a giant glass bottle of milk, in case you’ve missed the giant neon FUTURE CATWOMAN sign over her head lately. Also, does anyone actually get bottles of milk anymore or is that just a movie/TV thing? She wants to know if she can stay at the apartment, but Jim tells her no, he has somewhere else in mind. The sketch artist arrives to draw Selina’s depiction of the man who shot the Waynes, and Jim tells Selina he’s going to take her to stay at Wayne Manor afterwards. Better fold out the couch in the library, Alfred!

At Blackgate Penitentiary, a prisoner is being taken out for transport. He’s a genius bombmaker who’s incredibly dangerous and must be watched at all times, so of course no one checks his mouth or sees him spit out a huge square of paper and slip it between his fingers.

Meanwhile, at Stately Wayne One-Room Shack, Jim shows Bruce the results of the sketch artist’s work and asks if he recognizes the man. Bruce doesn’t, and neither do we. Bruce asks Jim if he believes that Selina saw his parents’ murder. Jim says he does. Alfred is not on board with Selina staying with them, thinking having the only witness to the crime at the house will put Bruce in danger. Bruce disagrees, saying Selina is the best chance of finding out who killed his parents. Jim agrees. Bruce says she can stay, then. “I’ve made my decision,” he tells Alfred, HIS LEGAL GUARDIAN, who responds “Yes, Master Bruce,” and then my head explodes.

Jim tells Alfred that he, Montoya and Allen are meeting with an assistant district attorney they trust regarding the case that afternoon. “A trustworthy lawyer?” Alfred mocks. “In Gotham?” Jim says if they do find the killer, they’ll need Selina. Witnesses back out of testifying all the time, and the ones who do testify do it because they care about the victims. “We’ll do our best to be nice to her, then,” Alfred replies, with the tone of a man who is definitely planning on short-sheeting her bed later.

Cut to a hallway where Selina is tossing a vase around. I don’t know if I’m more shocked by her mishandling of a priceless antique or the fact that Wayne Manor has actual hallways. Of course, they only lead to the void beyond time and space into which light cannot penetrate and from which there is no escape, but still, hallways! Bruce tells her the vase is from the Ming Dynasty. She snarks that you can get one just like it for $5 in Chinatown. He sticks out his hand to introduce himself, much to her amusement. She returns the handshake. “Selina Kyle,” she says. “But people call me Cat.” STOP TRYING TO MAKE FETCH HAPPEN, SELINA.

Bruce is more of a fan of the "meet formal" than the "meet cute."

Bruce is more of a fan of the “meet formal” than the “meet cute.”

On the transport van, the bombmaker is doing suspicious things with his hands. A guard asks him what he’s doing. Turns out it was just origami! These prison guards, so suspicious. The van is driving through an alley when suddenly an SUV comes straight for them. The driver swerves and crashes into a parked car, while armed men come out of the SUV behind the van and begin shooting. They shoot open the back doors and kill the bomber’s guard. A Russian voice barks, “Ian Hargrove, time to go!”

In front of the Gotham courthouse, we’re introduced to Harvey Dent, who I must mention is played by Nicholas D’Agosto, who was previously on the fantastic Showtime series Masters of Sex. If you haven’t seen that show, get on it now – Michael Sheen and Lizzy Caplan are both Emmy-worthy in it. Anyway. Dent makes a bet with a young juvenile offender that if the kid wins a coin toss, he’ll let him go, provided the kid promises to turn his life around. If the kid loses, he’ll go to jail. The kid, who Dent is talking to without a defense attorney present because that’s totally O.K., agrees and calls heads, which he wins, and Dent sends the kid on his way. This is not how being in the district attorney’s office works. This is not how any of this works.

Montoya and Allen introduce Gordon to Dent. Jim asks what happens if the kid guesses wrong. Dent says teenagers always guess heads, and shows Jim the quarter. It’s double-headed. Two-faced, if you will. Oh, show.

The coin has two faces! Like me! Because I'm going to be Two-Face!  Do you get it yet, or should I beat you about the head with this metaphor some more?

The coin has two faces! Like me! Because I’m going to be Two-Face! Do you get it yet, or should I beat you about the head with this metaphor some more?

In Dent’s office he asks Jim if the sketch is of the guy who killed the Waynes. Jim says they have an eyewitness, but it’s not enough to bring a case. It’s the people who hired this guy that they really want. Dent agrees, the eyewitness is useless in a courtroom, but the idea of a witness is valuable. He switches on a projector to show a photo of a gray-haired man leaning on a conference table. I’m not sure why Dent couldn’t just pass around a photo like a normal person. He asks Jim if he knows the name Dick Lovecraft. I’ve looked but I can’t find any references to this character in the comics, so this is basically just the Gotham writers beating us over the head with references again. He’s a corrupt property developer who has dealings with every crime element in the city, and since the Waynes’ deaths he’s prospered even more, including getting a piece of Arkham. Arkham? Lovecraft? You don’t say!

Dent says that Lovecraft feuded with the Waynes over their vision for Gotham, and he’s willing to bet his career that Lovecraft was involved in their murders. During all this, Dent is filmed so that half of his face is in light from the window and half is in shadow. SHOW, NO. Jim says that’s a big bet. Dent’s plan is to leak the info that there’s an eyewitness to the Wayne murders who will link Lovecraft to the Wayne murders. That will make Lovecraft and the people around him nervous, and when people get nervous, Dent reasons, they start talking.

“Unless Lovecraft wasn’t involved in the Wayne murders,” Jim points out. Dent says it’s still a win, because whoever was involved will get rattled and he bets they’ll start talking. Jim worries that the witness may become a target. Dent says they won’t actually file papers or name names, so the witness will be perfectly safe. Jim asks Montoya and Allen if they’re on board. Montoya says they’ve been on board – Dent is one of them. Dent tells Jim he wants what Jim wants, to make Gotham a better place. Jim reiterates that there is to be no naming of names, it’s just going to be a story. “Just a story,” Dent repeats with a smile as they shake hands on the deal.

Back at Gotham PD, Original Flavor Harvey gives Jim the file on the prisoner escape, telling him the prisoner was named Ian Hargrove, a clinically insane man with a compulsion to blow things up. He was being transferred to a psychiatric facility for care when the break-out happened. Harvey says the armed men are odd because Hargrove never used accomplices. Jim asks who Hargrove communicated with in prison. Harvey says he was in isolation and never made or received phone calls, only getting visits from his brother John. They’ve already tracked down an address and John is being brought in for questioning. Harvey needles Jim about being out and asks if it’s girl trouble. Jim says yeah. “Those high-society dames,” Harvey clucks. “Get you all twisted.” Harvey watches a lot of Turner Classic Movies.

Out on the Stately Wayne Patio, Alfred is teaching Bruce how to box when Selina shows up. Bruce stops, distracted, and Alfred takes the opportunity to punch him hard on the arm. I feel like this storyline is becoming a weird love triangle where the object of affection is Bruce. Selina asks what’s up, and Bruce tells her Alfred is teaching him how to fight. She asks why. He says it’s so he’ll be prepared if something bad happens. Selina snarks, “Yeah, because you live in a pretty rough neighborhood.” Bruce says he’s talking about in Gotham. You know, where his parents were brutally gunned down in front of him. That place. Selina tells him in Gotham people don’t fight with gloves on, and he looks down ashamed at his boxing gloves as Alfred looks away and considers how much arsenic he can add to the sugar in her tea without arousing suspicion.

Bruce asks Selina how her room is, and she replies fine. Other than, you know, being a whirling vortex of nothingness that can be neither seen nor felt. She is hungry, though. Alfred gets pissy, saying breakfast was at 8 and she slept through it, so she can just wait until lunch at noon. Bruce tries to cut in and say there’s still food in the kitchen and Alfred can make some for her, but Alfred says it’s not a bloody hotel, and he’s not making food for that hussy thank you very much. “Relax, old man,” Selina tells him. She says she’ll figure it out. “And you can mind your manners as well, you cheeky little minx!” Alfred calls after her. I’m sorry, but there’s no way a man in his fifties calling a teenage girl a “cheeky little minx” isn’t creepy as hell. Bruce hits him on the forearm – quite rightly! – and tells him to stop being so rude, Selina is their guest. Alfred apologizes, saying he didn’t realize Bruce fancied Selina. “But you watch her,” he warns, “she’s a lairy one.” Someone on the Gotham writing staff’s been hitting the British slang Wiki hard recently.

A door opens, and we finally have our first glimpse of Oswald! Thank you Robin Lord Taylor for coming to inject some life into this episode! It’s an apartment we’ve not seen before. Oswald looks through some mail, then picks up a framed photo to establish that the room belongs to Liza. “Liza, Liza,” he says to himself, inspecting the photo of her and Falcone, “what are you up to?” He twists his mouth around in a little devious smile, then looks up, curious about something. He goes to her purse and searches it, but clearly doesn’t find what he’s looking for. Then, on the bed, he sees what I think is maybe her headwrap from last episode? Or some sort of silk scarf? Anyway, the important thing is that he sniffs it, and it’s not panties, which is honestly what I was expecting it to be. Let’s all stop for a moment to ponder the fact that I have chosen to love a character I fully accept and believe would sniff panties.

Oswald goes to her dresser and takes a bottle of perfume and smells it, then smells the wrap again. “Lilacs,” he says with a smile. He takes the wrap and leaves the apartment, just in time for Liza to come home. Oswald does this amazing – I don’t even know, like reverse scampering crab walk up the stairs is really the best way I can describe it, and hides from her. She enters and notices immediately that something’s wrong. Her wrap is gone from the bed. She opens the door, but Oswald runs down the stairs just in time to avoid detection.

At the station, Harvey and Jim are questioning Hargrove’s brother. He says his brother isn’t a killer. I mean, apart from having killed those people with his bombs. Semantics. Anyway, Ian only blew up places that manufactured firearms and munitions. He thought what he was doing was right. When he killed people with his last bomb, John says, he felt guilty and practically handed himself in to the cops. All during this we see scenes of Ian making another bomb inside of a gift basket. “My brother’s not a bad man,” John insists. “He’s sick. There’s a difference.” I would argue not in the world of DC Comics, where the mentally ill are presented largely as psychopathic supervillains, but O.K. Jim asks who would want to get Ian out of jail. John says he doesn’t know, but his brother needs help. Meanwhile, Ian has finished his bomb, and the guys who broke him out of the transport van earlier are putting cookies and summer sausages inside. More like a calorie bomb, am I right? Ian’s also removed a plate with the name of his location from the side of the table where he prepared the bomb and slipped it in to the bottom of the basket. Could he be trying to send a message of some sort?

We cut to the Gotham Munitions Factory. Uh oh! And what do you know, they’ve received an unexpected delivery from a shady-looking Russian deliveryman! The security guards immediately dive in. One of them asks who sent it, but the other guards are like LET US NOT QUESTION THIS MYSTERIOUS GIFT BASKET FULL OF DELICIOUS MEATS AND SWEETS, so he starts munching too, and then KABLOOM. Ian looks on at the explosion with sadness from a nearby van.

Back at Stately Wayne Manor, Selina’s in the library with Bruce, having procured a croissant. Bruce offers for Alfred to buy Selina some new clothes, but she declines. She’s fine being dressed in perpetual cosplay for a steampunk convention that never happens. “Detective Gordon tells me you live on the streets,” Bruce says cheerily. “Tell me about it!” Selina says it’s not as nice as Wayne Manor, though without the tendrils of non-existence tugging at you every night. He asks if she lives alone. Uh, it’s the streets, Bruce. There’s not really a lot of privacy on the streets. Selina asks Bruce if he’s supposed to be in school. “I’m developing my own curriculum,” Bruce tells her. Seriously, the kid was in school for one day? Way to teach Bruce how to face his problems, Alfred. He says it allows him to learn at his own speed and focus on the academic areas that interest him. Selina says if he’s a billionaire, what does he have to learn? Bruce thinks this is a strange attitude. I think I might fall asleep recapping if Oswald doesn’t show up again soon. Bruce asks Selina about her parents. She says they’re around. Bruce tries to press further, but Selina is having none of it. “I’m not an orphan!” she exclaims defensively. What is it with this town and its insane prejudice against orphans? She storms out of the room and past Alfred, who purses his lips with disapproval, though whether it’s because she hurt Bruce’s feelings or got a croissant without his permission is really up in the air.

At the station, Essen is questioning Harvey and Jim regarding their progress on the Hargrove case. Not good, considering a munitions factory just got blown up. Turns out that the blow-up was in aid of a theft of weapons-grade explosives from the factory. “Using explosives to steal explosives, what’s that about?” Essen wonders. Look, show, you’ve already set the bar for crazy pretty high with the priest being tied to a balloon, don’t start acting like oooo, using explosives to steal explosives is sooooo wacky, O.K.? Jim says they must have another target in mind, one that’s difficult to crack.

Alfred interrupts by calling Jim to tell him the Selina arrangement isn’t going to work out. Jim says he’ll be out to get her as soon as he can. “We shall patiently await your arrival detective,” Alfred says with extreme irritation.
At Fish’s never-open nightclub, Butch presents her with two cell phones. He asks if she’s sure she really wants to do this, whatever “this” is. Fish warns Butch not to get scared on her, and he assures her that he’d never be scared. Just then, Oswald walks through the door, having heard my earlier plea for him to appear. “Oswald, you’re back,” she says with far, far less glee and general jumping up and down than I would do.

Oswald is super amused by her disdain. “I was passing by,” Oswald says cheerfully. “Just thought I’d say hello.” Fish wants to know why he’s there. “Honestly I’m just trying to be friendly,” he replies, with extreme sincerity. By the way, while I have my screen paused on a close-up of Robin Lord Taylor’s face (pretending that’s not something I do on a regular basis), I’d like to ask – is it just me, or have they toned down the pallid makeup and gross teeth on Oswald considerably since the pilot episode? I’m not complaining, you understand, just pointing it out. Then, without warning, he leans in and takes a huge whiff of Fish. “Mmmm,” he says, with the smile of a man who has just put together the final piece of the puzzle leading to his enemy’s doom. “Lilacs. You smell good.”

Guys, this is so wrong but I’m not going to pretend I’m not also into it.  I don’t know what this show has done to me.

Guys, this is so wrong but I’m not going to pretend I’m not also into it. I don’t know what this show has done to me.

You don’t,” Fish retorts, making Oswald laugh even harder. “Snappy as ever!” he exclaims, pointing to a completely bemused Fish. Then, abruptly, Oswald stops laughing, and tells her goodbye. “Sorry you’re still grumpy with me,” he says with a barely suppressed eyeroll. And then, with the tone of that friend who’s just concerned about your health while side-eyeing your cheeseburger, he adds, “you know, reaching out in friendship is never wrong,” before hobbling away. No, Oswald, don’t go and leave us alone with this episode! Oswaaaaaallllldddddd.

“Man, that dude’s creepy,” Butch says. I THINK BY CREEPY YOU MEAN DELIGHTFUL, BUTCH. Fish tells Butch not to worry about Oswald. “He’s nothing,” she says, still watching the door he left through.

Back at the station, Harvey’s brought Jim copies of Ian’s files from Blackgate. Jim seems distracted. I know how you feel, Jim. Jim tells Harvey that Barbara left him, and he doesn’t know where she went. I’m not really seeing this as a problem, Jim. Harvey tells him it’s a ploy to get Jim to set a wedding date, and she’ll be back. “It’s a standard move.” I’m not saying the writers mean anything by following up that misogynistic line with Nygma interrupting to ask if they play video games, I’m just saying I bet Nygma’s the kind of guy who’s really into ethics in games journalism. Nygma says he loves video games, they’re like puzzles! Speaking of video games, I cannot wait to play Dragon Age: Inquisition, it looks amazing. Anyway. Nygma uses this as the worst segue to introduce his evidence findings yet, as he’s found the nameplate Ian smuggled into the bottom of his bomb. Nygma tells them it’s from an abandoned metal factory in Gotham. Harvey tells Nygma he’s done good work. Nygma looks pleased as Punch, which is to say, as happy as a wife-beating serial murderer is about his crimes. That is a weird expression.

Ian is hard at work on another bomb when Harvey and Jim come in, guns drawn. Ian puts his hands up and tells them not to shoot. We see that he is chained to the desk. He tells Harvey and Jim that he was kidnapped and forced to make bombs for his abductors, who are gone now but will be back soon. He says they’re Russians and told him they’d kill his brother and his family if he didn’t help them. Ian tells them that the Russians are planning a big job against Falcone and that’s why they needed him to build explosives. While they’re questioning him and Harvey is undoing his chains, the Russians arrive. There’s a gunfight, and the Russians escape with Ian.

At Stately Wayne Library, Bruce apologizes to Selina for asking about her family and upsetting her. She says she wasn’t upset. Selina sees a photo of Martha Wayne and tells Bruce she looks nice. “You saw her,” Bruce says, “the night she was killed. And you saw me? What I did? What I didn’t do?” Selina asks what he could have done. “I don’t know, something,” Bruce says. Selina tells him there’s nothing he could do against a gun. She says her mom is in show business, gigging around the country singing and dancing and doing magic tricks, but really she’s a secret agent for the government. “But when she’s done she’s coming back to get me,” Selina tells him. “That’s…good,” Bruce replies. Changing the subject, Selina asks Bruce if he’s ever kissed a girl. He tells her no, taken aback, and wonders why she asked. She shrugs. “Just curious.” Alfred walks in, having seen the cockblocking signal, and tells Bruce it’s time for his studies. Honestly at this rate I’m thinking becoming a vigilante and hanging out in a cave is going to be a good outcome for Bruce, all things considered.

Back at the station, the mayor is haranguing Capt. Essen. Does the mayor have a name? I can’t remember. I just think of him as Richard Kind. Anyway, Richard Kind is mad they haven’t caught the bomber. Jim turns the anger back on him, saying it’s the Richard Kind’s fault that Gotham lacks psychiatric treatment facilities, and it’s because of that Hargrove was being transported, giving the Russians an opportunity to break him out. Kind of a stretch, but O.K. Richard Kind, even more pissed off, just says he wants the bomber found now, and leaves. Essen tells Harvey and Jim that she’s put the bomber’s brother in protective custody. Jim says the only problem is that Ian doesn’t know that.

Harvey Dent’s office, where he’s flipping his two-faced coin. Sitting across from him are Lovecraft and Lovecraft’s people, who are sadly not non-Euclidean geometric horrors, but normal people in suits. TENTACLES OR GTFO, SHOW. Dent tells Lovecraft he’s bringing charges against him. Lovecraft is amused. “That old song and dance?” he scoffs. He says Dent will never be able to bring fraud charges against him, and Dent replies that fraud charges are only part of it. He’s got Lovecraft for conspiracy to kill the Waynes, and an eyewitness who can implicate him. Lovecraft is having none of it. Dent asks Lovecraft to help himself out and hands him a confession to fill out. Instead, Lovecraft balls it up and throws it at Dent, telling him he’s a fool who has no who or what he’s dealing with. Dent comes unglued. “Don’t threaten me!” he snarls, lunging towards Lovecraft’s face. “I will rip you open!” Then, just as quickly, he snaps back to his usual pleasant self, to the surprise and confusion of everyone else in the room. “Good to see you Dick,” he says, straightening his jacket as if he didn’t just go all Mr. Hyde in front of everyone.

Over at the GCPD, Harvey has a lead on the guy who broke Hargrove out of prison. He’s Gregor Kasyanov, a former associate of Nikolai’s, who was slain in a robbery orchestrated by Oswald back in “Penguin’s Umbrella.” Jim asks who he works for now. Harvey doesn’t know, but obviously it’s someone with cash, pull, and a beef with Falcone. The problem is in Gotham that’s a long list. “So who is it?” Jim asks.

Cut to Fish stepping out of a car in gold stilettos and a fur-collar dress for a meeting with Gregor. She tells Gregor that his boss Nikolai is dead because of Falcone, and if he wants revenge he’ll hit Falcone where it hurts – Falcone’s money. Gregor says he’ll take Falcone’s money as long as it’s there like Fish promised. Fish tells him it’s there, and hands him a key to a truck. “And Gregor,” she calls after him, “break a leg.” I think when you tell someone in the mob to break a leg, a leg just gets broken.

Stately Wayne Outdoor Pool, and Bruce is underwater, fully clothed, seeing how long he can hold his breath. He pops out and checks his stopwatch, to find Selina perched on a lounge chair, watching him. “You’re the weirdest kid I ever met,” she says. Well, isn’t that the cat calling the bat black. She asks why he’s doing that, and he tells her he’s training. “Oh, so if anyone attacks you with a diving board, you’ll be ready?” she snarks. Bruce says it’s for self-discipline, so he can be strong. Selina says that won’t work on the streets of Gotham. It’s not enough to be strong, you have to be mean and ruthless. She asks Bruce if he knows what ruthless means. Bruce, defensively, says of course he does. Selina scoffs that he’s just a nice kid who’ll be mincemeat within five minutes on the streets of Gotham, and walks away, leaving Bruce to ponder her words.

In Nygma’s lab, he’s playing along to a trivia contest on the radio while examining the bomb-making materials. He attaches some wires and makes an explosion resulting in a hole through a block of iron, which delights him. He shares his findings with Jim and Harvey. The explosives are a specific type that’s hard to manufacture, and for a single use – to penetrate iron, he says, showing them the hole in the iron block. “Like a vault in a bank,” Jim cuts in. Nygma says no, that bank vaults haven’t been made out of iron in at least a hundred years, and then Harvey realizes, “the Gotham Armory.” It has old iron vaults, and was bought by a private investment group a few years ago. “Ten to one Falcone’s behind it,” Jim says, and they brush past a crestfallen and stammering Nygma on their way to investigate. Oh, Nygma. Always left out of their reindeer games!

Over at the Gotham Armory, there’s a trail of dead security guards leading to the vault, where Hargrove has attached his bomb. He blows it, but the vault door doesn’t open. “It didn’t work,” Gregor declares, just as the door comes crashing down. His guys go in and remove the money, taking it to the van outside where Jim and Harvey find them. Guns are drawn, and backup arrives. Jim tells Hargrove his brother is safe. Hargrove starts to come towards him. Gregor gives the order to fire on Hargrove if he runs. Hargrove puts his hands behind his head and continues towards Jim and Harvey. Suddenly, the tension is broken by a phone ringing “The Final Countdown,” which will never fail to make me think of GOB and his illusions. We see the phone is connected to a bomb inside the van. Jim tells everyone to get down as the van explodes and money goes flying. From a safe distance, Butch watches, trying to figure out how to tell Fish that her plan failed. We see that Harvey and Jim got Hargrove clear. Jim stands up and watches the money flutter from the sky.

Stately Wayne Breakfast. Selina throws a bagel at Bruce. He asks her why she did that. “Bet you can’t hit me,” she challenges. He says he could, but asks why he’d want to. Selina tells him if he hits her, he can kiss her. The library erupts into a food fight, Bruce smiling and laughing. Alfred walks in to see Bruce enjoying himself, and walks into the hallway to make a call to Jim and say it’s O.K. if Selina stays with them after all. “She’s a breath of fresh air,” he tells Jim, just before being sucked into the void under the stairs.

Liza walks in to her apartment to find Oswald sitting at the end of her bed, in an opening stolen directly from the self-insert Mary Sue fanfic epic I’m writing. Damn you, Gotham writers! She gasps. Oswald puts up a hand and asks her to forgive him for the intrusion, but he has an urgent need to speak with her. “You know who I am,” he says. “Yeah, and Falcone would kill you if he knew you were here,” Liza tells him. This thought amuses Oswald.

The saving grace of this episode? You're damn right.

The saving grace of this episode? You’re damn right.

“Perhaps,” he acknowledges. ‘But what would he do if I told him you were spying on him for Fish Mooney?” Liza says he doesn’t have any proof. Oswald agrees, but says suspicion is a funny thing, getting up and walking over to Liza. Falcone might not believe him at first, he tells her, “but every time he looked at you, he’d ask himself, is she? Could she? Would she?”

Liza tells Oswald he’s wrong, that Falcone cares about her. “Let’s call him and find out, shall we?” Oswald offers, dialing her phone. He gets in a few digits before she shouts at him to stop. He gets even closer to Liza, who is now distraught and very uncomfortable. He caresses her arm and gives her that pinched-lip, twisted mouth smile of amusement at the fly caught in his spider’s web that he does. “Your secret is safe with me,” he assures her. “I won’t tell because you are going to keep working for Fish.” He pokes a finger in her chest for emphasis as tears stream down her cheeks. “And you,” poking her chest again, “are not going to tell anyone, or you’ll die.” Oswald looks so pleased with himself. He gets to backstab Fish or stab Liza; either way, there’s going to be stabbing, and he’s really happy about it. I’m sad, though, because that’s his last scene for the episode, meaning it’s back to the dreary main plot. I suppose my problem with this episode is that it’s just so much treading water, without any of the revelations of “Penguin’s Umbrella” or the craziness of last week’s office fight club episode “The Mask.” Sure, we’ve got Harvey Dent arriving and being metaphorically two-faced, but there’s no new information.

Speaking of Dent, he arrives at the station to tell Jim he met with Lovecraft. He tells Jim he met with Lovecraft, and Lovecraft was scared. He’s sure someone will start talking soon. Jim reminds him not to make a move without Jim first. Dent’s all, yeah, yeah, of course I won’t!, and congratulates Jim on the Hargrove case. Jim sees Harvey coming in, and tells Dent he’ll see him soon. I don’t really understand the point of that exchange except to set Dent up as a recurring character, I guess. Harvey brings news that Hargrove’s being sent to Arkham, which is reopening at the mayor’s directive. Jim says that’s nuts, the building is 200 years old. “Welcome to Gotham,” Harvey shrugs. He adds that Hargrove told him the bomb that blew up the van wasn’t his. Jim asks whose it was. Harvey says Hargrove didn’t know.

Back at Fish’s, Butch comes in and tells Fish that all Gregor’s guys are dead, although they lost the money. Fish says that wasn’t the point – she wanted to tie up loose ends and hurt Falcone. “That you did, Fish,” Butch agrees. “That, you did.”

Mayor Richard Kind calls a press conference to announce the reopening of Arkham. We see Hargrove arrive at the facility, the clock tower surrounded ominously by dark clouds on what appears to be an otherwise sunny day.

Finally, we hear a voiceover of Jim leaving a message on Barbara’s cell, pleading for her return. He needs her to come back. The apartment needs her to come back. Can’t Barbara see how they’re suffering? Barbara, however, is tucked up in another bed, fireplace crackling and a glass of red wine nearly finished on the nightstand. She lays on her side, looking pensive. A feminine hand appears from behind her to caress her shoulder. Barbara turns to Montoya, and they begin making out as the final title comes up.

Next week is the final episode of Gotham before the show takes a break until January. I’ll be livetweeting “Lovecraft” on my Twitter @Dachelle, and sobbing over the absence of Robin Lord Taylor from my television screen for a month. Speaking of the precious gift to our world that is Mr. Taylor, I hope you all caught his very first late night talk show appearance on Seth Meyers last night! If you didn’t, the show has a clip up where he talks about going to college with Seth Meyers’ brother and doing early Billy on the Street videos with Billy Eichner.

Later in the interview, he talked about the fan reaction to the Penguin on Twitter, saying he was worried about people watching because of their concern for Oswald getting hurt on the show. It all comes from a place of love for your performance, RLT. And maybe a teensy bit of craziness.

Until next week – same Penguin time, same Penguin channel!

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Courtney is a returning reader to the world of comic books, drawn back in by the power of Tom Hiddleston's portrayal of Loki in the MCU and her attraction to broken antagonists with questionable hair. Favorite titles she's currently reading include Loki Agent of Asgard, Saga, Silver Surfer, Ms. Marvel, Gotham Academy, and The Wicked + The Divine. Older favorite comics are Lucifer, Sandman, Kieron Gillen's Journey into Mystery and Young Avengers, and Runaways. When she is not watching television or reading comics and novels, Courtney torments herself by attempting to write fiction. Her favorite apocalyptic scenario is the eruption of the Yellowstone supervolcano. She enjoys riding horses and distrusts chickens, which she considers to be merely T-Rexes in a clever disguise. One day they'll reveal their true colors and you'll see. You'll all see.

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